- Thursday, March 03, 2016
- 0 Comments
So Valentine’s Day happened. It’s
kind of a scary day, isn’t it? It’s the one day where you are expected to
participate in romance no matter how old you are or whether or not you are in a
romantic relationship. You’re expected to determine labels - who’s with who?
Are you dating that guy you’ve been talking to over lunch? People will be
wondering.
Here on Purple Lipstick, you’re
going to hear a lot about knowing yourself, but today we’re going to talk about
knowing someone else. We’ve had three Valentine’s Days together so far and we
can tell you from our experience that it has been much different than we were
expecting. You know the classic chocolate and flowers gift? We couldn’t do that
because each year we’ve been in different continents.
When I (Albert) was in high school,
I, like most guys, found that Valentine’s Day was about showing off. It was a
statement about giving a gift as extravagantly and publicly as possible. It was
about me, not them. And when I (Abbie) was in high school, Valentine’s Day for
me was about who was going to pay attention to me and what gifts I was going
receive. Even though I had no intentions of getting a boyfriend at that point,
I still wanted someone to make me feel special.
Valentine’s Day feels like a day
where you are meant to feel special, where you’re supposed to be the object of
someone’s mad affection. The standards are so high it’s almost like people
expect you to step into a movie for a day. In this movie, the cute boy from
class, unable to contain his unbearable devotion for you, comes running up to
you (roses in hand) and confesses his unending love for you.
The reality is, this isn’t a great
way to look at Valentine’s Day. When you’ve found someone who’s happiness means
more to you than your own, gifts on Valentine’s Day look a whole lot different.
It’s not so much about getting but about giving. Your significant other’s
happiness becomes the goal, and you begin to look for presents or ideas that
aren’t going to make a big show but are going to make them smile. You lose the
idea of being seen and spend hours, days and even months preparing for a gift
or moment that will make the other person freak out. And it’s worth it when you
see them open the gift or experience the moment and see them truly happy and
they realize how much thought and care you put into it.
It’s funny to think that the other
person’s reaction means so much; perhaps it’s even more important than what you
received. If anything, Valentine’s Day is an opportunity to be truly selfless.
It’s an opportunity to make one day really special for someone else and try to
put into words and actions how much they mean to you.
- Sunday, February 14, 2016
- 0 Comments
Valentines day can seem daunting for anyone who doesn't have a significant other. As someone whose dealt with the agony of February 14th's for what seems like centuries now, I can definitely relate. Fortunately, there are tonnes of things you can do to start feeling the love this V-day. I thought I 'd share 5 super simple ways you can treat yo' self this Sunday, and hopefully you'll be smelling the roses for days after!
1. Pamper Yourself
Wake up a little earlier in the morning and run yourself a nice, warm bath. Add some lavender, scented candles and relaxing music (some Bon Iver and Brooke Fraser are my recommendations) and you're basically in another world. Calming yourself is a great way to start the day and will immediately put you in a good mood.
2. Affirm Yourself
After sneaking out of the bathroom, slip into a fluffy bath robe and take some time to meditate. I like to grab my Bible and a daily devotional and think about Gods love. One of my favorite verses to read when I need a boost is Zephaniah 3:17. "The LORD your God is in your midst, a mighty one who will save; he will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing." Knowing you are loved makes it easier to love others, whether they love you or not.
3. Eat the Cookie!
Valentines day is a great excuse to spoil yourself with something sweet. The list of treats you could make to warm up your insides is endless. A good idea would be to bake some cookies or brownies the night before. I've been trying to eat a lot healthier recently, and I was so surprised to find lots of delicious recipes! Try blending raw coco beans, coconut oil and some almond milk together. In a few minutes you'll have an amazing sugar free chocolate spread! Put it on some toasted bread and you're suddenly in heaven ;)
4. Surprise your friends and family with gifts
One of the best ways to feel great on a any day is to shower the people around you with love. Dash over to a craft store and make some personalized gifts. A colorful valentines day card accompanied by a bag of assorted goodies, is enough to make anyone swoon, and for a reasonable price too! Writing notes with words of encouragement is another way to make others feel loved, brightly colored note cards are great for this.
5. Love, don't compare!
Don't try to compare yourself to the people around you. Instead, look at them with love. Its such a great thing that there exists a day where people are appreciated and affirmed. There's an old hym that goes...
"Oh Master grant that I may never seek so much to be consoled as to console,
to be understood, as to understand,
to be loved as to love with all my soul."
This message is refreshing and inspiring, as it reminds us that in a world filled with selfishness, we get to choose to be selfless. In a world filled with emptiness we get to choose to pour our love out. Find someone who isn't being shown love and give as much as you can to them. It is more blessed to give than to receive, and you'll find you are more filled up than before!
I hope you enjoyed these tips! I know you're going to have an amazing Valentines day, but let me know how it goes anyway, and if these helped ;)
Love Always.
Marly
xoxo
- Friday, February 12, 2016
- 0 Comments
I have had more than my fair share of
crushes, but one day I finally got sick and tired of being sick and tired of
the drama that comes with romantic crushes. It took me meeting the Last Crush.
He was gorgeous to say the least, sparkly eyes and dimples, what girl could
resist dimples?! I mean he had dimples! That’s enough said! We seemed to hit it
off from the start. He got double ticks for the flattery and the sweet
empty-nothings! He had a way of just pulling them out of nowhere! And I took it
all in! We exchanged numbers and we started communicating over Whatsapp for a
few weeks. And then we finally met up again. Don’t get excited, this was not a
date! We just met up (insert side eye emoji) at a one of the city’s nicest
spots. And it was a disaster. I told you there was nothing to get excited about….Lol.
He behaved so poorly. He tried to flirt with my friends! Oh YES he did! *Finger
snap and neck roll* And then suddenly, standing in that restaurant, an arm’s
length away from this guy, it was as if the scales just fell from my eyes. I
had seen it from the get go but I had chosen to feign ignorance, but at that
moment, I could not deny it.
That was the very last crush I ever had.
That experience made me realize that I had treated God like a seat filler for
way too long. It forced me to go back to basics and fall in love with God, I
presented my heart to Him because I now truly understood that He designed it, and
I can trust Him to do better with it than a mere mortal man who has to borrow
breath from Him would. I needed to fill the hole in my heart. Yet only God,
whose love is like a never ending well; whose love never runs dry; only God who
loved me before the beginning of time could adequately do that job! Only God
has that quality written on his resume yet I had been so unwise so as to fire
Him several times for counterfeit saviors. No temporary things on this planet
can ever take the place of God. A boyfriend, that job, good grades, that
Michael Kors designer handbag or whatever it is that you value above God, may
add to your life, but it can never replace your relationship with God. I had to
cut off my addiction to romance because it was hindering my walk with the Lord.
I cut off all “randoms”**. Now I choose
to be intentional about developing my relationship with God, I choose to focus
on increasing in the knowledge of God everyday instead of chasing after a
relationship or the next big crush. I just get up every morning, taking each
day as it comes and I intentionally pursue a relationship with God and I give
my days to Him. My desire for romance is no longer a priority. Instead, I have
taken up a lifestyle of waking up and choosing God every single day of my life.
Ladies, the Creator of the skies loved us
before the beginning of time. Because of that, sometimes we just have to
overvalue ourselves. Know our worth and add taxes to it J
You are so Loved <3
-Noni
**Random- A person that you know you’ll
never marry or build a meaningful relationship with but you date him because
you are bored or lonely
- Wednesday, February 10, 2016
- 6 Comments
At the beginning of the New Year, I made a
decision to take a long break from all things "social media". Now, I
am so obsessed with Instagram and Facebook, so this was a tough call to make
but it had to be done. I realized that I was not using social media to edify
God in any way, instead I used it to stalk my primary school best friend who is
now living it up in Dubai!! a lump of envy would rise to my throat every time I
saw her pics; outfit and hair ALWAYS on fleek (whilst I on the other hand could
barely keep my relaxed hair straight for a full day) ; eyebrow game so strong;
the hashtags #Yass #Slaying are basically the order of her Instagram daily
life. And I would feel bad about my own life which pales in comparison to such
fabulosity. And usually by the time I exhausted my 250MB daily bundle, my heart
would be green with envy and I would be so discontent with my life. But I thank
the Lord that He called for an intervention in my life during one of our
one-on-one sessions and He reminded me of Galatians 6:5 "...don’t compare
yourself with others. Each of you must take responsibility for doing the
creative best you can with your own life…" (The Message). Basically He was
saying two things: firstly; "My dear Nnonipie (I think that's His nickname
for me. Lolie), if only you could fully understand and fathom what a creative
God I am. I don’t do carbon copies, neither do I specialize in
one-size-fits-all. Before you were born, I mapped out a unique purpose for you.
Stop looking over at other people as they do what I have (or at times what I
have NOT) tasked them to do, basically: run your own race! Walk in your own
lane!" How liberating! It made me feel free to know this truth.
You see, competitiveness and jealousy are a
form of bondage at their core. Their tie up our happiness like those little
weights that hold down helium balloons. What a waste of time!
So just relax and trust God. Celebrate
other people's success; share in their pain. Learn to love yourself. And THEN
learn to love others, that way you will never feel the need to covet their
walk. Realize that everyone's lane is tailored to suit their different needs
and strength according to the unique way God fashioned them. Find contentment
in the seasons of your life. In the end God's perfect plan will prevail. Do
your own thing; that unique thing God is leading you to do! Comparing yourself
to someone is like comparing the Victoria Falls to the Table Mountains. They
are both beautiful. In the words of one fabulous Mrs. Ashley Brown;
"uplift, edify and inspire each other rather than trying to compete and
outdo. It’s pointless and a waste of your energy". I say; there is room
for everyone to win :)
You are so very loved
xxxx
-Noni
-Noni
- Wednesday, February 03, 2016
- 3 Comments
